Explanations

Since the time had come for me to slowly start packing everything up, the time had also come to figure out everything back home. Mainly this meant dealing with the ex-bf.

Let me explain things to everyone first, provide some background if you will on this whole situation. J. (the ex-bf) and I had been best friends since I was about 16 years old. I met him where I had my very first job and he dated one of my friends. We were inseparable all through high school. When it came time for college we ended up at the same school. Our first two years we both lived on campus. He lived a floor below me. Needless to say, we were still inseparable.

Once our Junior year hit and we were able to live off-campus and decided to live together. We rented one of the many crappy houses that surrounded the campus. Our last two years of college were a blast. It was great living with him. He dated and I dated. But never each other.

After college I had law school next. We moved out of the crappy house and into a nicer apartment together. It had worked out so well for us, we figured it would keep working. We were good roommates. Half-way through my first year of law school, something happened between us. We were just laying around watching TV when he asked me out of the blue, "why have we never dated?"

I thought he was joking, so I threw a pillow at him and told him it was because he smelled.

He wasn't joking. After a long conversation we decided to give it a try. In the back of my mind, I knew why we never dated. He was not a one girl type of guy, and I was not into casual dating. But we decided to give a try. The first couple months were great. I was dating my best friend. The problem was, he never made that transition from best friend to boyfriend. He kept treating me the same.

Right before I came to London we had a long heart-to-heart. Things weren't working out. We would never not be best friends. Maybe some time apart would make things better. I knew it wouldn't. Right after I left to London, he went back to his old self. Lots of girls and me the best friend. That is why I got the email telling me it wasn't working.

The reason I was so ok with everything was because I knew it wasn't meant to be. We stilled emailed the entire time I was in London, but it was as best friends. Over the last two weeks we had decided that maybe it was time we both lived alone. We wanted to maintain our friendship and we figured the best way to do that is to not be living together anymore.

So, J. moved out and found a place nearby. It will be weird going home to the apartment knowing it is all mine, but I think it's the best thing right now. I have never lived alone, and I am excited about it. I can decorate how I want and walk around naked if I want...haha. It's a new chapter in my life and I am ready for it to start.