"Not ready to make nice"

January turned to February. March came and April went. Before I knew it was June and summer was in full swing. I had not spoken to Meg since that night in my apartment. She had tried to call me, but I was just not ready yet. With school and work and other friends I had managed to keep myself busy. I would lie if I did not admit that I missed her. There had been so many times when I wanted to pick up the phone and fill her in on stuff, but I could not bring myself to do it yet.

Aaron and I were approaching our one year anniversary and I could not be happier. I knew he had something planned for us and would not fill me in as to what it was. All I knew was that I was suppose to clear the whole weekend for it. I was beyond ecstatic and was also so happy he was planning everything. It's always nice to have things planned for you.

I was out and about the day before we were suppose to leave getting some last minute things...travel shampoo, and stuff of that sort. I was rounding a corner at Target when I almost got run over by a cart. It was Pat. He was the last person I wanted to see right now.

"A.!," he seemed as surprised and as uncomfortable as I did.

"Hey," I said trying to sound as emotionless as possible.

Before I could tell him I was in a hurry he started what I think can only be described as word vomit. You know the feeling. You start talking and things that you really did not want to come out of your mouth do. You seem to not have any control over what comes out. "I'm so sorry for what happened. I know Meg is too. She is going crazy over this. You have to talk to her. I don't know what to do with her anymore. I keep telling her to talk to you, and she says..."

I stopped him mid-sentence when I realized he was talking as if he and Meg had been seeing each other. "Are you guys seeing each other?," I asked not sure if I wanted to hear the answer or not.

"Ummm....well not really seeing each other. She isn't my girlfriend if that is what you ask," he said making it sound like he was noble one here.

"God Pat, leave it to a gentleman to not date your ex's best friend but to sleep with her!"

"It's nothing serious A. It's not like it was with you. It's just sex!", he started to yell at me as I began to walk away.

I turned back to him and said, "I really don't care Pat. You deserve each other, just leave me out of your sick little world." And with that I walked away.

I walked away knowing that I really did care. I was hurt by two people that had meant a lot to me. I still had held hope that Meg really wasn't that callous. I've said it before, but I like to believe that people are inherently good. It takes a lot for someone to loose my friendship. At times I give people more then second chances, but I think even I had reached my breaking point. I knew all I could right now is go on with my life.

As I was walking out to my car, my cell phone rang. It was Meg. I hit the ignore button and headed home to pack.